Things I love/hate About DID

Love’s

1. Never being alone in my head I’ve always got a conversation going on inside my head or more fun and interesting out loud. This was a comfort because for so long I thought I was crazy because I’d talk out loud to myself and reply which you know is Crazy Right? But then I found out it was my system usually responding and through journaling I learned my systems names ages and likes dislikes so it’s like having my own personal family which was a huge relief because first I wasn’t psychotic lol. Second I had a fear of abandonment for years and no therapy helped until I started becoming co-conscious of my system which in turn got rid of the abandonment issues!

2. So for years since I was 16 I had gone to a Rheumotologist for a lot of autoimmune issues Juevenile Rheumotoid Arthritis, Fibromyalgia, Raynauds phenomena eccetra. Anyways I had to get bloodwork every three months to see what my blood levels where and my doctor was amazed after a year of bloodwork because never in 30 years of practicing medicine had he seen a patient test positive for RA Factor and positive for antinuclear antibodies and then 3 months later negative and then positive for 6 months then negative again it’s legit unheard of. And it wasn’t the labs fault he checked. So what’s amazing about this is my host personality has a bunch of medical issues and some alters have asthma and epilepsy recently narcolepsy as well and co occurring mental illness as well different alters different diagnoses. Anyways what’s amazing is that your body and mind actually separate and can develop different diseases or conditions or in my case test positive one month negative another for a test that once you turn positive you never should be negative again. Lmfao!

3. I had and sometimes still have a legitimate and honest I don’t remember saying or doing that card. I used to get very mad at my system for the amnesia because I would say or do something and my parents or friends would be like you said “blah blah blah” or crashed my car and now that it doesn’t happen as much though I still have it on a less frequent basis. I miss it! It was kinda like drinking blacking out and realizing you did all this crazy cool stuff or not so cool stuff by someone else’s experiences of it and no memory. But now I remember everything mostly and it sucks.

4. I used to have to go to daily AA/NA meetings for drug addiction now that my alcoholic/druggie alter. Mimi and I talk internally now and I only go to a meeting when she wants to go. And second since I have a lot of medical issues I’m obviously one a lot of medications some narcotics when I used to abuse them now I can literally take them as prescribed and have my therapist count my meds weekly as a backup in case Mimi wants to take more or front but the whole system agreed to make sure Mimi’s needs are met emotionally which she agreed to only front when she’s really stressed or lonely and we go to the meeting co-conscious.

5. I have a legit superpower as do all people with DID do.

Hate’s

1. Some doctors and therapists even friends and family think I fake this.

2. When I switch at night and don’t get any sleep because a Teenie wanted to binge watch his or her favorite show on Netflix for the whole night.

3. Having people kinda back off when I say I have DID because of what the media portrays us as

4. Having so many thoughts and interests that I couldn’t pick a college major and stick to one. Finally we all agreed psychology because we can help people like us and we like helping people! Thank the Gods!